She's · a · Poem...

I never write in here anymore.....too busy to write. Nothing really crazy goes on in my life. Me and the Whit went to KY this weekend.....then to Superman's hometown of Metropolis....SUPERMAN IS CRAZY!!!!!! Life is not so much. AH Bleh I suck real bad. I look around my room and I need to get rid of a bunch of shit....A BUNCH....time to grow up and let go of things. I have let go of alot of things in the short time of this new year.....I Like it. I just need to keep moving....keep moving.....KEEP MOVING!

Me and my momma are so close. I see her as a Best Friend alot of the times. But I have come to realize that me and her seem to be less alike than I had thought. She is just like to stupid sister in so many ways that it just completely pisses me off. She is just so angry at everyone ,because she has had such a awful life herself. Which I can completely understand. Its not like I have had a perfect one myself....I dont have time to be angry or push people away. Life is just to short to hold everything against people. People make mistakes, hurt others, and shit on people all the time. You cant let that stop you from caring. People = shit in my book as well... I MEAN I HATE PEOPLE....but the people who have been so wonderful to me in the past, which who have also hurt me at times....I STILL LOVE! nothing will change that and that doesnt make me angry....but it does her. I dont want to be bitter.





<td align="center"> Gabrielle --
[noun]:

A human transformer (Robot in disguise)

'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com</td>

The losers, the haters, the drugies, the grossies, the worthless people of the world....can find this wonderful wonderFUL WONDERFUL Treasure......but not me....why? Why have I been so good in life to recieve nothing. Why do I get ahold of this beautiful thing....and then it lets me go. I get to hold it for just one second it seems.....and then they take it away. What did I do to deserve this. I wish someone would just let me be happy.....stay happy?

I miss John Peter Bowman!!!!!

On another note....I MISS my Daddy. I have tried so hard to be close to him again, sometimes it works.....other times he doesnt even talk to me. I want him back.... I miss the long car rides, talks, walks, good will trips, laughs, stories, how he always listened and helped me with everything. He was wonderful....everything would be so different if he were never in my life but he was...HE WAS FOR 18 YEARS....we were so close. and then the divorce...I am his only child and he chooses my sister over me....she has kids. She is not his. Its not far at all. He is the only dad I will ever have, and I want him back. My neighbor just lost his father...I dont know how close they were...but I can only imagine how he is feeling, and it breaks my heart. I dont want to lose my dad.

HEHEHEHEHAHAHAHAHAHEHEHEHEHHAHAHAHAHAHAHEHEHEHEHEHAHAHAHAHAHE

FUCKING ME AND WHIT!

        ST. LOUIS

                 BITCHES!!!!!

I am sooooo OUT for the WEEKEND!!!!! 

                     Maybe I'll see ya Monday....WRONG!!!!!!

lately....things have been different. I need to get this off my chest.

I have come to realize why it didnt work between me and you.....
I envied you so. I wanted to be you....out going, funny, quick, witty, intelligent,the person everybody loved. I admit, I was jealous. Really. It's hard for me to admit something like that....I have truely come along way in life after you to realize this. I am just so shy and awkward. You made me feel wonderful. You were so good to me in everyway. I always treated you so badly the majority of the time. I couldnt appreciate things for what they truely were. You just always had something wonderful to do .....and I never did anything worth anything...ever. It made you sad you had such a busy life...and I only had you. I wanted to be the most important thing to you....that sad part about it is....is that I really was a one time and I, in the end, ruined it all for myself. Again, I really just couldnt appreciate things for what they were. I ruined alot of things for me and you. I was just so proud of you and thought you were so wonderful...that I wanted to be that too....I wanted you to see me that way in your eyes. Its sad that I couldnt ONLY love you just to love you. I loved you because I really loved you but also because you seemed to be my opposite. My other half in so many ways....yet we were so alike. You were eveything I so missed that I could be and in that it kept me going. I was so mean to you at times....I guess cause I just didnt want you to be so perfect all the time. I dont regret what we had. I loved you and still do and more than likely...Always will. You were perfect in my eyes...still are. I just wanted to be as amazing to you as you were to me. As I said...I DO NOT regret what we had....I loved it...more than anything EVER in my life...I can actually say it was the best 3 years I have ever had. Wonderful, perfect.

Envy....my fault.

OOO well unlike most I refuse to racap on what happened in my life in the past year...cause all last year was, was PAIN!!!!!!
So my NEW year will be amazing!!!!!!
-get to meet Brad in Evansville....hopfully soon!!!!!!!
-get to meet Josh in Kokamo.....hopfully soon!!!!!
-last semester of VU
-Eastcoast.....here me and the whit come
-love will hopfully be found
-the summer will be amazing cause I will already be on the east coast
-summer on the beaches
-massive weight loss cause of little food cause of little money on eastcoast
-new years next year in NEW YORK...seeing the ball drop with my sweet whit
O you only wish you could be me now!

O FUCKING SWEET!!!!

THIS YEAR= AMAZING!!!!!!

heartbreaks no more...It was done so long ago, I guess you must have forgotten that. I refuse to act as a child about any of this anymore. Now take your damn heart back. I am so willing to be your friend (CAUSE I DONT WANT YOU ANYMORE) but you are just willing to be a dick, acting like I have ruined your life....I did nothing....nothing.....I held on for about a week, after that it was done. I let go...it seems you haven't. We had so much and for that I deserve respect as a person...and you do as well. I have given you nothing less than respect...only MORE. I dont want you or anything from you...get over YOURSELF!

I am so glad I loved someone so awful,because now I can truley appreciate someone so wonderful.

I leave on thursday for Cincinnati....I will be gone for 5 days WHOA.....

I REALLY LIKE SOMEONE...and I think I will just scream if I do not get to tell him soon! I have liked him so much since the first day in photography, at that time he had a girlfriend but now she is out of the picture. She hurt him so bad....he loved her...SO sad. I totally know that kinda story. Things seem real strange lately...I seem real strange. I am just sad....I wish so much that I was just delt a different life...a real one. I was looking through myspace today and ran into a girls myspace that was in my class....and she is out of here and married and happy and soon she will be going to Germany. She is living my dreams.....why cant that be me? I want out of here so badly. I want to forget all these stupid memories here with alot of people.....I just to be done with Vincennes and I want love and a life...A REAL LIFE! like the one where I am actually 21 and living it!

Blessid Union Of Souls
Light In Your Eyes

I can't remember the last time that we kissed goodbye
All our "I love you's" were just not enough to survive
Something your eyes never told me
But it's only now too plain to see
Brilliant disguise when you hold me
And I'm free
I've been thinking and here's what I've come to conclude
Sometimes the distance is more than two people can use
But how could I have known girl
It was time and not space you would need
Darling tonight I could hold you and you would know
But would you believe
There's a light in your eyes that I used to see
There's a place in your heart where I used to be
Was I wrong to assume that you were waiting for me
There's a light in your eyes
Did you leave that light burning for me
Cards and phone calls and photograph pictures of you
Constant reminder of all the things you get used to
Is there a chance in hell or heaven
That there's still something here to build on
Or do you just pick up the pieces after they fall
But after all
There's a light in your eyes that I used to see
And a song in the words that you spoke to me
Was I wrong to believe in your melody
There's a light in your eyes
Did you leave that light burning for me
Should I keep on waiting or does love keep on fading away
Fading away
It's been a while since I've seen you so how have you been
Did you get my letter I wrote you, but I did not send
I tried to call your old number
But the voice that I heard on the phone
I recognized but she told me the number was wrong
There's a light in my eyes but it's too bright to see
And a pain in my heart where you used to be
Guess I was wrong to assume that you were waiting here for me
There's a light in your eyes
Did you leave that light burning for me


So today I was listening to a burnt cd and this song was on it. It makes me sad and yet happy all at once!
Christmas is COMING and I cant fucking wait....I get out of town for a little bit lol SWEET ASS!!!!!
have a good night my baby dolls......

"Hallelujah"

I've heard there was a secret chord
That David played, and it pleased the Lord
But you don't really care for music, do you?
It goes like this
The fourth, the fifth
The minor fall, the major lift
The baffled king composing Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah

Your faith was strong but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you
She tied you
To a kitchen chair
She broke your throne, and she cut your hair
And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Mabye I have been here before
I know this room, I've walked this floor
I used to live alone before I knew you
I've seen your flag on the marble arch
Love is not a victory march
It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

There was a time
You let me know
What's real and going on below
But now you never show it to me, do you?
And remember when I moved in you?
The holy dark was moving to
And every breath we drew was Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Maybe there's a god above
And all I ever learned from love
Was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you
And it's not a cry you can hear at night,
It's not somebody who's seen the light
It's cold and it's a broken Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah